Hello! I am Bad Luck Chuck and I am the newest resident of Roe Circle. This weekend, I accompanied two baboons on a trip to IKEA, the most wonderful place on earth. Here is our journey. If you don't think this first picture is funny by the end of our trip, then you have no sense of irony.
The plan was to leave Friday after the baboons came home and drive to Davenport and spend the night. Then we were going to be at IKEA first thing in the morning, shop, and hit the road to make it back to the tree house before 8pm.
Hey, it was a long trip and I had to take a leak.
We finally made it to IKEA!!
Here I am with the big guy, checking out chairs. I was thinking more of a hammock style, but I guess this one was OK too.
We managed to get in and find everything in less than 2 hours! (Almost) Everything they wanted was in stock and we were herded into the check out area.
We loaded up the truck and got everything wrapped up. It was sprinkling on and off, but they said as long as we were moving, everything would be fine.
We were forced to stay at the "nicest hotel in Monroe City" over night. The big one bought a battery charger and the little one pouted in front of the TV and drank beer.
We decided to limp out of town by whatever means necessary, which meant we drove about 30 miles, found a gas station and recharged the battery.
At the Walgreens in Moberly, a nice lady named Holli let us plug into the inside outlet and told us if you put in the E-brake one click, the lights will go off. That should help. We figured out there was an O'Reilly's open so we went there to see if they could help.
Before we made it to Homer, the GPS died. Now all we had were phones. We didn't make it to Homer's just yet. We had to coast into another gas station for one last charge, less than 5 miles from Homer's place. At this point, we had been travelling for over 6 hours and made it about 90 miles.
We finally made it! And Homer had located a rebuilt alternator. He could get us fixed up in a matter of hours.
Homer was my kind of monkey.
As we got on I-70 and back into civilization, the clouds seemed to part. I have never been so happy to be on I-70 and see the signed for the adult superstores.
Once we were back, everything was unloaded and unpacked. Since we spent the night and most of Sunday in the rain, the boxes were all soaked. Luckily, nothing was damaged or broken.
- Never drive through rural Missoura. Stick to the interstates, even if the GPS says it's faster the other way.
- Never buy a GM.
- Never buy an electric car that you have to charge.
- If you meet a guy named Homer in Columbia, MO, you should shake his hand and buy him a beer.